The DISabled to ENabled podcast

*COVID 19 Special | Brad Dell : ritual self care*

May 5, 2020

Enabled Warriors, we are here with Brad Dell to have a quick chat about the corona virus that's going on. It's taking-- well it has taken, let's say over the world right now. And everything's kind of working out and it's a little bit crazy. So let's find out how things are where Brad is in California. So how are you finding things right now, Brad?

I'm, so far I've been pretty at peace, because I've been able to read a lot. And I've always wanted more time, sorry, ever. I'm trying to be more empathetic to the struggles of those around me. And when I do think about the things that are happening, I feel a lot of anxiety. I've been very privileged to be taken care of and to still have my job, but I know that many other people are suffering and that's very anxiety inducing to think about. Yeah,

yeah, totally. And have you been doing doing things like limiting the news and kind of trying to do more meditation or anything like that? Have you kind of found any coping mechanisms.

Yeah, so I have what I call a ritual list. And that list is basically kind of like a bullet journal where I mark off the things that I did each day. And so I have items like yoga or meditation or did I drink my three cups of coffee and, you know various things that helped me calm down. And so I'm strictly following that list and keeping focused on self care.

I love that that's awesome. Well, what what are things like in California right now what they kind of advising and telling you to do and stuff?

Yes, so... California was one of the first states in America to shelter in place where we have to stay locked down in our houses. And because of that, we have significantly flattened the curve. We are doing very well right now in comparison to the rest of the US and we have no idea when it will end but thankfully California because of the industries that we have, a lot of people are able to do remote work. So we better off than most states in the US and doing well. Yeah.

Cool. That's pretty good. So, are they kind of all the states kind of competing against each other, like you can flatten the curve? and things like that.

Yeah, America is naturally very competitive in itself. So states are all you know, who's doing better? Who's doing better?

Okay, that's not a bad thing. If it can, you know,

it's great in this case.

And, uh, but um, well, it's not really changed for you as much. But you kind of work from home anyway.

Yeah, yes, I already work at home. I usually I work in coffee shops. And I get a lot more exercise and so I'm trying to fix things and get a lot more exercise be more active. It's really showing when I tried to sleep at night and I have so much pent up energy. I can't even close my eyes.

Oh, gosh. That is one thing that I'm missing is going to coffee shops and working in there because like, yeah, it gets a bit relentless, isn't it?

Yes, yeah.

I'm also really missing meals out this week. I don't know why this week in particular, but like every time I get to cook something I'm like, yeah. So yeah. So how do you think the COVID virus has really affected you up till now?

So it's involves a lot of logistical changes. I normally stay in a house with three housemates and all of them are essential workers. And so that wasn't really going to work for me because I'm immunocompromised. So if they're going out more chance that they'll bring the virus soon. So thankfully, I have a very, very generous family at my church, and they have a very nice guest house that they've allowed me to stay in. Since I've been staying there, emotionally, I think kind of the biggest problem has been a lot of burden marrying a lot of people. They know that I've been through isolation, that for about eight months during my transplant journey, I was in what right now sheltering in place. So a lot of people are coming to me for help with their anxiety and everything. And happy to help. But there comes a point where you have to draw boundaries so you don't overwhelm yourself. So I'm going to do that now. That's kind of the hardest challenge right now.

Yes, to kind of manage your own anxiety say that you can help other people.

Exactly. Yeah. Selfish to self care. Yeah,

I really do think that's one of the hardest things.

Yeah, cuz I know I've written a lot of columns on like, trying to stay positive and all that sort of stuff. And sometimes you yourself do not feel positive, but you're like, I've got to, you know, make such an effort to be positive to so I can help other people. And I think, yeah, it's one of the hardest things to really push through. And

yes, personally.

It's crazy. Do you think there'll be any positive things coming from this whole virus experience in the future?

Yeah, so you know, In my self care, I've been embracing slowness and stillness and silence and intentional solitude. And for me, I feel like a lot of people, we try to distract ourselves from the challenges that we have our mental struggles. And I think it's important for us to really sit with those thoughts and process them, rather than suppress them through distraction. So I'm hoping that people will learn that, you know, this slowness and stillness is not necessarily a bad thing. That in our world where we are constantly having our phones at hand, and we always want to distract ourselves, it's good to sit and just be with ourselves and know ourselves and really think things through and be introspective. So I'm hoping people learn that during this time that they've actually imported their phones and just sit with themselves. And I'm also hoping that we come out that some people have a new empathy for those who have chronic conditions that they can realise Oh, when you know So isolates himself during the flu season picks it up their immune system. I know that's like no and I can't believe they go through that every year. I want to reach out and be a better support for them. Or maybe, you know, they realise the paranoia being around a bunch of germs all day. And they realise, oh, this is someone else's everyday life, this isn't new for them. Now I understand now I want to be better support. So I'm hoping that out of this comes empathy, empathetic support. So I'm hoping, hoping in America that like, healthcare wise we get it together, that we realised that we shouldn't be attaching our insurance to employment. Instead every person should be taken care of as a human right.

Yeah, totally. Totally. And this, this is still that that thing in America as well where all of the kind of healthy produce and things and shops and coffee shops and like grocery store is still far more more expensive than the kind of processed stuff. Do you think that'll change? Maybe? I'd hoped that it would Hmm.

I think there will be.

I'm not sure in terms of natural produce, I think there will be a change of thought in how we handle the supply of foods. I guess like as an example, right now we have a surplus as they call it of milk and eggs. And rather than give those to the needy, instead, they're pouring out the milk and crushing the eggs. To them a surplus merely means there's items that they can't sell. They don't think of it as these are items that we could give to people who actually need it. So I'm hoping that moving forward, I'm not sure if that's a problem in other countries, but in America, I'm hoping that we move forward and realise that if there's a surplus that means Notice that we have an opportunity to care for other people and give to people who are hungry.

Yeah, totally. And that that's that's something that's that's huge and it needs to be, you know, addressed out this whole thing for sure.


hmm. It's crazy. I remember what my brother calls the virus. Do you wanna hear? Yes? My little brother is calling this whole thing. The Apocalypse. He keeps messaging me he messaged me every day and I never hear from him for months normally, but he messaged me every day and he's like, yeah, after this apocalypse. Oh, but you wanna go and do this? Yeah, after the apocalypse is over. That's actually really nice that this this whole kind of thing is actually brought us together, like closer together as brother and sister.

Yes, yeah. I think we'll have a newfound gratitude for a community of all types from the family.

Yeah. And I can say for sure that I am going to get no work done when this is over because family going to be picnics let's go and do this. Let's go down to the river that's

I'm just gonna like I do have to work.

Yeah, yeah. Nice goes on maybe differently. Yeah,

I don't know.

So there we go that was the Coronavirus chat for the day. Thanks so much Brad and Brad's episode soon on the disabled to enabled podcast



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